My Only Mirror is Me
Mirror, mirror on the Media Wall, WTF? Females in Fantasy & Media. Where oh where do we go from here?
Well first up, before we go anywhere, it might be time to take responsibility for where we are and what we’ve chosen, and continue to choose, to take on board.
The Media, and the lovingly exaggerated and photoshopped images you see splattered across all its forms, are not your mirror.
You are your mirror.
If you give that power away, that is your choice to do so.
But you can’t then come back and complain that you don’t like the mirror you’ve replaced yourself with.
You did it. Not ‘them.’ They just held up an image and you swallowed it. Hook, line and sinker.
These images are ideas and visual extremes. Let them be. Enjoy them for what they are. The more extreme the better the lolz.
Caricatures & Archetypes – Simplification & Exaggeration
We live, for the most part, in an entertainment world of Caricatures and Archetypes.
A Caricature simplifies and exagerates.
An Archetype is essentually a beginning pattern or form – a starter person if you like – that most of us can relate to.
Caricatures and Archetypes work really well because of their simplicity. They are easy to understand and a large majority of people can relate to them.
However, people, living, breathing, unphotoshopped, sexual, multifaceted and realish are a little bit more complex than that.
And as the caricatures and archetypes get further away from us. e.g. Physically unreplicatable (#photoshop) or Frustrating (#finding beautiful sexy images of women with weapons that look like they’d actually use them as weapons and not sex toys), the cries ring out, “That’s not me! You’re not representing me!”
Truth be told – they never were. And they never have to.
Looking for You in All the Wrong Places
You, the real you, is never binary. You’re not good or bad, clever or dumb, a sex kitten or a nun, a super hero or a victim, a good girl or a slut. You’re all these things.
Probably all these things and more in the space of an hour on a good day.
And on a bad, day, well.
We oscilate and swing between so many aspects of self. Some of them authentic. Some of them swallowed from the media. Some unconsciously lapped up from all manner of places and things.
This complex, authentic person is never to be found in a Caricature. However could they be? But a good caricature can point to them. And really, that is all we can ask of them.
What we can never ask, is that the caricature define us. Because then we reduce ourselves to something that is not real, not obtainable, not because it is more than us, but because it is less.
Females In Fantasy & Beyond – The 13 Traits of Uberness – More Not Less of Ourselves
Can look sexy as hell without looking like a caricature (simplification and exaggeration) of female sexuality.
Kick Ass, Curl Up
Can kick ass and curl up like a kitten in your lap later, and not have that be a contradiction.
Can have the kind of sex they want, with who they want, in what context they want, when they want it, and not be labelled anything – especially by other women!
Can use weapons as weapons, but also retain the right to use them as sex toys if that’s pleasing to them (but could we please get more “caricatures” of them using weapons as weapons. Thx).
Can be bitches and not give a flying f*** if you don’t like it.
Nice so Sucks & So Not Real. Can be “Not Nice” and not give a flying f*** if you don’t like it.
Like a Boss
Can be bossy and not give a flying f*** if you don’t like it.
Hold Your Freaking Space
Can hold their space doing whatever the f*** they want. Run companies, be professional fighters, be in the military, strip, do porn, be a nun, be a stay at home mom, save the homeless. Own it. Hold your space. You’re not better or lesser than anyone else because of what you “do.”
Can be smart. Really crazy smart. And sex kittens and sex tape kittens and kick your ass. All at the one time! Multitasking – females are good like that.
Can choose to have monogamous relationships, kids, mortgages on white picket fences, or not.
Dry Wit & Sarcasm
Can exercise dry wit and sarcasm. (#onlystupidpeoplefinditlow :))
Can stand up to the mofos who believe mutilating our genitals, raping us, beating us, setting fire to us and selling us as prisoners to perform sex and breeding acts to some random asshole in the name of religion, is good for us and good for the world!
Can own, feel and bliss out on the magical, sensual creative juices and energy that everyone wants to harness but can never be captured. (See actual reason for point above. Ah!)
Men in Fantasy & Beyond
There’s no us and them. We’re all in this together. Male, female and every myriad variation in between.
And if we all hold our own space and be exactly who we are, it lets everyone else do it to. No matter what sex they are. And no matter what their Caricatures look like.
And that is how evolution starts and worlds change. The caricatures and archetypes in the media catch up eventually. But it doesn’t start with them. It starts with me and with you.
We’re not archetypes or caricatures. We’re not photoshopped. We’re better than that. Way, way better than that.
Gen-Next. Bring it on!
“Charming Sex, you will be free: just as men do, you shall enjoy all the pleasures that Nature makes your duty, do not withhold yourselves from one. Must the more divine half of mankind be kept in chains by the others? Ah, break those bonds: nature wills it.”
The Marquis de Sade as quoted by Angela Carter in The Sadeian Woman. Highly recommended reading!
© Copyright Sarah Sofia Delaunay 2015